Spontaneous Seinfeld Episode #20130603

[–]fuckingcaptcha 2494 points 5 hours ago

"She switched my turtle, Jerry! She's a turtle-switcher!"

"It's horrendous, I agree! A crime!"

Enter Elaine.

"Hey, you'll never guess what I just got - a turtle!"

Bass twang plays

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[–]DeadForTaxPurposes [+1] 2051 points 4 hours ago

"You think she switched?"

"Oh, she switched."

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[–]Jordan311R [+1] 1624 points 4 hours ago

"It's missing a toe, Jerry. A toe!"

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[–]HiimCaysE [+1] 1683 points 4 hours ago

"I can't even kiss her anymore, Jerry!"

"You wouldn't kiss a switcher?"

"That's what I'm saying!"

"Well, I think you need to switch the switcher."

"Gotta switch the switcher."

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[–]superpervert [+1] 338 points 3 hours ago

Whoah, Now hold on a minute Jerry. You can't just swi- swi- switch 'em out like that. I''ll tell you what you gotta do. You gotta convince her to switch you. I'm telling you, you get her to do that and you're (wink!) home free. Hey, where are your marshmallows? Why are you always out of marshmallows?

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[–]RiskyBrothers 72 points 3 hours ago

george enters

Do you know what Steinbrenner is having me do!?

Jerry: what?

"Plan a special event for a game. A special event Jerry!"

Kramer: "hold on, maybe you could give me a little help"

George: "Help?"