An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding tightly onto her hat so that it would not blow away in the wind.
A gentleman approached her and said, "Pardon me, madam. I do not intend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up in this high wind?"
"Yes, I know," replied the lady. "I need both my hands to hold onto this hat."
"But madam, you must know that you are not wearing any panties and your privates are exposed!" said the gentleman in earnest.
The woman smiled and replied, "Sir, anything you see down there is 80 years old. I just bought this hat yesterday!"
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