I survived three years of depression so intense I can barely remember it. Unable to make the most elementary decisions; paralyzed by despair; attacked on all sides by some psychic phantasm that knows you intimately. Your mind besieges itself, and you lose the ability to function as a human being.
If people haven't experienced serious, clinical depression, they'll never understand the way it totally envelops you. You can't really blame them for it - it is an extremely hard thing to imagine - but some care and tact goes a long way.
I got through it and I'm living a very fulfilling life. You will too. It's just a matter of time and resilience.
There is nothing shameful about depression. Depression is a disease. Never be ashamed about it.
Take care. The end will come eventually. There are people who will help you, and you always have the company of people from far across the world who're connected by the internet, sharing in similar experiences, and survivors looking to help people currently struggling.
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